Maybe It Was Meant For You.

  Ceremony, celebration,intention, and ritual, are all parts of a wedding I can get behind. There is a lot about weddings I don't understand, so we scraped all of that and were planning a raw, intimate, sacred evening where we would vow to be stand up people for, and with one another for the rest of our lives. We were gathering only our closest loved ones, we were keeping it simple so we could really be present, and we were clear on our intentions around our marriage.

I will be eternally grateful that from the moment Rene asked me to marry him we made a deal to enjoy the planning of our wedding, and we stuck to it. While it was a big event and there were a lot of details to take care of, we never made it a drama or took it too seriously. We knew we would have a wonderful time no matter what, plus everything just seemed to fall into place. It was unfolding perfectly.

I am so thankful that we were chill during the organizing, because the wedding day never came. Rene died 27 days before what was to be our wedding. What remains are my memories of the days leading up to what was supposed to be ‘the best day of my life’, but they are amazing.

I never bought into the wedding day being better than any other day. Of course it would have been something special, but we lived special days time and time again. Over the past 12 years we have had many many ‘best days of our lives’. We had a beautiful summer and I have countless love filled memories of the days before he was taken away from me.

As seamlessly as the wedding was coming together, it also fell apart. His death was very publicized so I didn’t have to do anything to disassemble the wedding. Everyone involved reached out and just like it was never meant to be, it fell away.

The only thing I have left, other than a few precious keepsakes is his suit.  It has never been worn, never been altered, and I am looking for someone to make memories of their own in it.

If you knew Rene, you know he was generous. He cared about people, was proud to share, to help out, and to make others happy. I have been intentional with letting go of Rene’s belongings. It is sort of a ritual, a form of ceremony, a way of slowly acknowledging endings.  Every single one of his belongings has passed through my hands on their way to his family,  to his friends, and some to strangers. I know he would want someone to have his suit. To wear it, to spill drinks on it as they toast with friends, to hug loved ones, to laugh and have a night to remember in it; to make memories wearing it just as he would have. 

It is time for me to find that person. I would love to see it make someone's day special. To see someone living, and loving in it. If you know the person help me connect with them. Please do not be shy, I wish nothing more than for someone who will wear it to have it. Maybe someone who would never buy this for themselves but has somewhere to wear it, you will be giving me a gift. If it might be you, send me an email. ChelseaRay@CultivateBalance.ca It is lightweight 100% wool, black with thin black pinstripes.

Stonehouse, Made in Canada

European fit.

Jacket 44 tall

Pants  38 tall ~with all my love