The Need To Say Goodbye


The Need to Say Goodbye. It is that time of year when we are asked what our resolutions or goals are for the New Year, or in yoga speak, what are your intentions? It is a great time of year to get clear on our direction, still you must exhale before you can inhale. So I ask you this, what are you letting go of?

We want the replacement before we are willing to let go of something, we want to be securely in our new career before leaving our current job, want a new partner before leaving our relationship, the benefits of a different job but the perks of the job we have; we pine for all our future dreams to come true while keeping everything we have now.

The truth is we can have the life we want, be who we want to be, and have the career we want to have, if we can get clear enough about what we want, and more importantly if we are willing to let go of what is in our way. The trick is being brave enough to go for it, letting go of what you have now in order to open up space for what you want. You have a fine marriage, but do you not deserve a great marriage? Feel unsatisfied at your job but  it pays the bills, not connecting with your kids, well isn't that the norm these days? These little lies we tell ourselves to make it fine to live the life we live so we don't have to get real about it and become courageous enough to make shifts. From my experience it is far better to go for the life you want than to feel stuck in a life you are not content with.

I have time after time been shown that if I am willing to let go of the things that are not the way I want in my life I open space for the right things to come in. For most of us letting go is so hard we don’t, we cling to these things, we marinate in them, and unconsciously revel in them holding us back. For example; divorced but still living in the anger and hate for your ex-partner, dislike your job but unwilling to leave it for something else, tired of “friends” that pull you off track but keep them in your life because it is known. Sometimes it doesn't look like something so negative, sometimes what is in our way looks like something we love. A job that we have had forever that is great for us but we know is taking all our time away from what we need to be focusing on. For me this was my serving job, I liked it, it payed me great, it was reliable, and I had been there for years. Yet I knew that it was a crutch for me, and it was time for me to say goodbye, I had had this knowing for years but out of fear of the unknown stayed. When I finally found the trust to let it go some amazing opportunities filled the new space. More recently I have left a few yoga studios I love, I really loved teaching yoga at them and the students, but still I had an offer to teach yoga in another recovery centre that I could not turn down. These are simple examples, but pervasive in our lives. We are inherently un-trusting and stuck in fear of "what if " so we make no moves; I say take control and live by choice not by chance.

I was once told you can have anything you want, but not everything. By saying yes to one thing you must say no to another. Trying to have it all may leave you feeling like you are off track, you aren't. Get clear on what really matters to you, then be brave enough to let go of what is in your way, and be trusting enough to live the life you want to live.

“Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light.”-Yogi Bhajan

With love